Monthly Archives: August 2016

Trophy Wife

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Well my trophy wife is at it again.  She got another award, and she is retired!  I never received an award of any kind when I was working, let alone since retirement. I have caught a trophy fish or two, as you can see from this photo, Fishermanbut I never received any kind of award for it or anything.   But my wife just keeps piling up the awards. While she was working she received an Outstanding Teacher Award from the YWCA, an A+ Award from Omaha Public Schools, and was a recipient of an Alice Buffet Outstanding Teacher award.  That one was especially sweet, because it’s funded by Alice Buffet’s nephew Warren, and as you might have guessed, a sizable amount of cash went along with it.  Plus 500 one dollar McDonalds coupons.  No shit.  Granted a person can only stand to eat at McDonalds for so long.  But you start handing the coupons out to neighborhood kids and they think you’re a nice guy.  Then they won’t egg your house at Halloween.  So the coupons worked out well that way.  These are just the majors.  There are all sorts of school and personal citations and conferments she’s wracked up.  If you think I can name them all you have your head up your ass.

But just in the past two months, she picked up not one, but two more awards.  Remember, she’s retired!  First she got a call from her alma mater, College of St. Mary, informing her she  won a special alumna achievement award.  Then  last week she got a letter from the Nebraska Art Teacher’s Association to let her know she is the recipient of the very prestigious Roscoe Shields Service Award.  Geezuz it never ends.

winner    LEFT:  My Wife with One of Her Trophy’s

For the record I did come real close to scoring an Employee of the Month Award when I was working for Target.  But then along came Fred, the logistics exec and an unequivocal prick.  He started lobbying for Bambi, a member of his logistical team and who also had a part time job as a pole dancer at a strip club about two blocks down the street.  The word is Fred applied what some would say was undue pressure on his subordinates, and thus I came up a few votes short.  I never thought Bambi was the corporate type, and in my mind she was totally undeserving of the award.  Sure, I have to admit there were some things on the company ship I could never get on board with, but at least I never told any of my supervisors to go fuck themselves, which I heard through the grapevine is something Bambi suggested Fred should consider attempting on a number of occasions.  Fred always chose to overlook Bambi’s outbursts though, probably because he chose to underlook the big boner he got anytime Bambi would happen to toss attention of any kind his way.

I believe my opinion of Bambi was ultimately validated, because less than a week after receiving her award she disappeared.   I can’t say for sure if that award went to her head or anything, but I heard from a pretty credible source it’s what motivated her to leave town for Vegas where she felt she could apply her talent to more poles, emotionally crushing Fred’s balls in the process.  The  end result was substantiation of a fundamental yet casually dismissed principle of life:   Big boners often interfere with logical thinking and have a way of impeding real progress.

Unknown-1    Except for some recognition from an infatuated supervisor, Bambi worked here in relative obscurity

wmfokabdz1tpg9id3rmn   This is the facility where Bambi labored tirelessly to become a real crowd pleaser

My personal trophy case might be empty, but there is no doubt in my mind that the moral revealed in Fred’s story is something you can take to the bank.

Oh my gosh you know what I just remembered? I should have got some kind of award for saving that woman’s life. They hand out awards to people who saved someone’s life all the time. I never got one. How come?

 

 

My Last Trump Comment (I Mean It This Time)

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After my last blog about Donald Trump, I made a vow to myself to quit blogging about him.  I thought that his gaff about inviting Russia to hack government computers was as non-presidential as it gets, and if people still thought he actually had the temperament to govern our country after that absurd statement,  it would be pointless to say or write anything more.   But then, you guessed it, he fired off another incendiary remark, and this one, I have to say, is as dangerous as it gets, at least if we are considering the fact that this guy is running for President of the United States.

What I am referring to is Mr. Trump’s cavalier 2nd amendment remark.  Just in case there is someone out there with nothing better to do than read my blog that is still unaware of what he said, here is the most concise article I could find about it and I think it gives a pretty fair analysis of what was said or meant to be said.http://www.politico.com/story/2016/08/trump-clinton-second-amendment-judges-guns-226833

If you are not totally bored or even nauseated by this article, or our political process in general at present,  pay particular attention to the last three paragraphs of this article- a description of what Bob Owens (coincidentally a part of the NRA hierarchy)  tweeted and then deleted.  His initial reaction to what Donald Trump said is exactly that of the Secret Service and, I would guess, that of the majority of the population of our country- a subtle suggestion, either intentional or unintentional- of assassination.   Mr. Trump’s supporters came to his defense by suggesting this was his rather ambiguous way of motivating pro-gun sympathizers to vote, or that it was even a joke.

But this kind of comment should not be construed as a joke of any kind.  And the type of ambiguity and innuendo that  Donald Trump consistently purveys is a major reason that makes him so dangerous and unfit to be president.  He is constantly saying things that  have no basis of fact, yet have just enough believability attached that somehow they seem credible to a large segment of society.  What I am talking about goes beyond normal political hyperbole- like suggesting Ted Cruz’s father was linked to the Kennedy assassination, and encouraging violence at rally’s by inferring he would pay legal fees for any of his supporters so involved.  And the veiled threats are directed at anyone who dares to criticize him, not Just Hillary Clinton.  He says he will “hit ’em hard,” leaving what he means by that to the imagination of anyone who will listen.  If someone tries to pin him down on one of his outlandish statements, his reply will often be “I heard it from a lot of people.”

But what is so alarming about the emotionally driven rhetoric of this second amendment remark is how clueless he seems to be about its repercussions.  Words Matter!  There are plenty of unhinged people out there that will be interpreting these words as Bob Owens did initially.  But in the case of the emotionally disturbed,  all the hatred that Donald Trump stirs up will be just the incentive one of them will need to take matters into his own hands.

Ok.  I’m done.  That’s it from me about Donald Trump.  One last general comment.  I really believe the Secret Service will be challenged more than ever before in protecting our 45th president, no matter who it is.  Mr. Trump might consider the fact that, should he be elected, the lunatic fringe is not the domain of a specific political party.   We do not need any type of rhetoric, whether it be a joke, something sarcastic, misconstrued, or God forbid intentional, that would have even the slightest chance of provoking someone to commit yet another senseless and abhorrently violent act of hatred.