Student Protest 1965       Student Protest 2015

Football rules.  Yale, Princeton- wake up!  You have the blueprint for successful  protesting right before your eyes.  Your rebellions need a serious upgrade.  Get your football team involved like those Missouri students did.  You should know this.  You’re going to school at Yale and Princeton for Pete’s sake.  What was your SAT score anyway?  Same goes with Ithaca College.  Oh shit!  Sorry.  I forgot.  Your football team sucks and you probably hope to keep the limelight off of that dismal bunch.  But Yale and Princeton, come on.  Your guys aren’t doing too badly.   I guess I don’t know for sure if records hovering just above mediocrity fill up your stadiums,  but that Ivy League tradition has to count for something.  I bet just like Missouri your administrators aren’t about to kiss off a million plus bucks by not playing a football game.  I know it’s the Ivy League and maybe contractually a million dollars per game is not exactly the standard that the league signs up for, but if your football team doesn’t show up there has to be some kind of very serious penalty, not to mention the lost revenue and fan hysteria.  You should grab that leverage by the balls and run with it.  You would get what you want before the sun sets.

The power of football is so glaringly obvious I am surprised it has taken this long for someone to utilize it.  Sure there is that ongoing threat of student athletes unionizing, but that shit will be tied up in litigation for years.  The real iron in the fire readily available to strike is not the unionization thing.  It’s simple modern student activism coupled with confusingly germane athletics.  If something is  bothering you, pick up your cell phones and get the word out to your football team.  They’ll give those administrators such a fucking migraine your demands will be boxed up and gift-wrapped and delivered right to your door.

Student Advocate  1965                                               Student Advocate  2015

The threat of a football game being canceled has so much potential.  Outside of a nuclear bombing,  from my perspective there is nothing in existence that possesses the negotiating leverage of football.  Its attraction is so powerful I think there is a distinct possibility we could harness that energy for the common good.  Every country in the world should have a football team.  And I’m not talking about that soccer shit.  That just won’t fly here.  Well maybe if we want everybody to take a nap it would work out.  I know that sport is huge everywhere except here in the U.S., but believe me if we get everyone on board with American football the sky is the limit.  We’ve already been infiltrating Europe with NFL games  If we are persistent enough we can get the whole world exposed and addicted.  It seems to me we are doing a pretty good job on that front.

When every country finally has its own national football team, the world is bound to be a better place.  If some country feels there’s some kind of shenanigans going on in another county all that needs to be done is to threaten to cancel the upcoming football game.  Dignitaries will be making phone calls and flying all over the place to broker a quick resolution.  And think about it.  If some shit-ball organization like ISIS comes around fuckiing with our football, the entire world will raise up in indignation and exact hell-bent revenge.  This is just one of my really good ideas that I think should be given some serious consideration.

Jimmy Walker- Funny              Johnny Walker- Not too Shabby     Wheeled Walker-Not Funny at all

More on that later probably.  I love St George.  The scenery is stunning and though I avoid the place in the summer if at all possible because of the relentless heat, this time of year the weather is perfect for me.  There is one thing you should prepare yourself for however if you some day do decide to visit here.  In this valley of the octogenarians what you will be completely bombarded with will be the constant presence of the Fox News channel.  I actually caught a break with my mother for awhile.  The various incapacitations of her predicament evidently caused her to kind of forget about Fox News and I was able to sneak in a considerable amount of football viewing the first few days.  That all changed yesterday as she settled in to her rehab accommodations.

Of course the next Republican debate is coming up, tonight as a matter of fact, and the entire Fox News organization is giddy with excitement since they are hosting the event.  I have to admit it holds some interest for me since the last one caused so much consternation among the candidates.  I’m kind of surprised some of them didn’t dial up their mothers on their cell phones and complain to them right up there on the stage.  It’s a debate.  Answer the questions.  Sure some of them are borderline ridiculous but behind most are the desire to find out if you are a nincompoop or not.

The big complaint from most of these presidential hopefuls was that the questions during the last debate were too personal or off topic, at least from what I can gather.  Personally I didn’t see a lot of that, but that’s just me.  But Fox News apparently got all lathered up about it.  I don’t know for sure because I never watch Fox News.  But that’s what I hear.

While shifting around uncomfortably in my chair listing to Bill O’Reilly last night, something he said caught my attention.  He was interviewing one of the moderators of the upcoming debate and of course handing out his advice on what the line of questioning the moderators should use.  He was insistent there should be some “entertainment value” offered, that there ought to be some “zingers” thrown out there to keep the audience’s attention.  And the moderator could’t agree more.  Maybe it’s just me but I think that is what all the complaining was about over the last one.

So you should pay attention tonight.  Maybe the moderators will take Bill’s advice and we will be in for a real treat.  I know I’ll be watching.  I’m here in St. George Utah.  I have no choice.